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What’s in a word?
My wife and were talking about work stuff and she said something very interesting about me. She said that I do not have “thick skin”. Now I thought about it for a while only to find that I was embarrassed, hurt, tearful and annoyed.
All of this is a joke of course but I wanted to learn more about her comment. It stemmed from a friend of hers getting the business from her boss including threats of losing her job due to unfulfilled projects. Outside of the threats, she was ripped until she succumbed to tears. My comment to that was something to the effect of standing up for oneself (in a manner that is professional, of course). I believe you have to stand a ground where you can do what you say and vis-à-vis. As long as you deliver what you promise, you can have the right to defend yourself when needed.
I was told I do not have thick skin and that I am offended easily. When I heard this, I was offended… LOL (Joke again). However, the point is, I have no problem with confrontation; even with the boss if the situation calls for it. Now, I am not saying you must be rude just to prove a point, but I do believe there is a stance to take and that all sides must be brought to light. Now, what I cannot tolerate is the personal attacks from people hiding behind their positions. That is an act of coward proportions. I have seen that ill activity in a number of work environments and I did not like it then nor do I like it now. If that makes me “thin skin”, then I agree with the assessment, totally.
What’s in a word? What have you been called or not called lately?
Monday, October 5, 2009
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Diving lines (What they can bring)
Dividing...
I am not a big fan of TV sitcoms (situational comedies). My reason, because the men of the show type are always viewed as idiots or buffoons; where the wives seems to have all the answers and the right to rule the (home) universe. No matter you look, the man is asking if his outfit is the to liking of the Wife. Last I checked, the Wife became the Wife partly of the husband’s attire (among other things, of course). When did things change when the couple said, “I do”. Did he immediately lose his sense of style (assuming he had one to begin with)? And why does he always appear stupid to the Wife and her girlfriends? My Wife is a huge fan of some of these shows and I consider such time as HER time. Especially with her favorite Real Housewives of Atlanta (Yuck!).
I am not sure if I am overly sensitive to this subject but when will this madness stop? I believe there is balance to be had where both are right and wrong sometimes. We need encouragement when we are down, and we need support when we are afflicted and suffering. The Man can be strong enough to confront an intruder in his home, but later criticized and mocked when he ends up on the wrong side of the victory from said confrontation. I guess there is something for all to watch and dare I say, enjoy. However, I am NOT a fan of such shows or situations where we men have to apologize for being less than intelligent and more so, overly apologetic for our shortcomings.
I do not want to sound like a hater, but enough is enough. Men, stand up and represent the best you can.
By the way… I cannot stand the show “Real Housewives of Atlanta”. Ladies, if you are real about yours, please stand up and share your thoughts…
Out
I am not a big fan of TV sitcoms (situational comedies). My reason, because the men of the show type are always viewed as idiots or buffoons; where the wives seems to have all the answers and the right to rule the (home) universe. No matter you look, the man is asking if his outfit is the to liking of the Wife. Last I checked, the Wife became the Wife partly of the husband’s attire (among other things, of course). When did things change when the couple said, “I do”. Did he immediately lose his sense of style (assuming he had one to begin with)? And why does he always appear stupid to the Wife and her girlfriends? My Wife is a huge fan of some of these shows and I consider such time as HER time. Especially with her favorite Real Housewives of Atlanta (Yuck!).
I am not sure if I am overly sensitive to this subject but when will this madness stop? I believe there is balance to be had where both are right and wrong sometimes. We need encouragement when we are down, and we need support when we are afflicted and suffering. The Man can be strong enough to confront an intruder in his home, but later criticized and mocked when he ends up on the wrong side of the victory from said confrontation. I guess there is something for all to watch and dare I say, enjoy. However, I am NOT a fan of such shows or situations where we men have to apologize for being less than intelligent and more so, overly apologetic for our shortcomings.
I do not want to sound like a hater, but enough is enough. Men, stand up and represent the best you can.
By the way… I cannot stand the show “Real Housewives of Atlanta”. Ladies, if you are real about yours, please stand up and share your thoughts…
Out
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Knowing the rules.
Knowing the rules
When you are in someone else’s space (be it work, relationship or otherwise), it is said that you must play by their rules; really? Now, say it’s about work, and you don’t like the environment or the boss that run the environment. What are your options? You can always quit and keep your pride or you can knuckle under and accept what’s given to you. Either way, there is some maneuvering to look forward to.
What about relationships? You’re with someone who has a lot of what you seek in an ideal mate. Not to mention, you’re afraid of being alone. Now I hear all the time that one needs to be by them selves to get to know them selves. I believe that. However, what if knowing yourself mean you don’t like being alone (different from lonely). Your mate has a few quirks that are less than desirable. How do you manage that?
How much is enough to conform to what we need in order to survive the environment we choose? Is there a line that exists where enough is enough? How do we incorporate OUR rules so that our needs are met? I find that we need some calibration tool to manage the ebb & flow of our feelings so that we do not burn out sooner than later. But at the same time, there is a need to be cautious because we are judged by the standards of other rather than ourselves.
My thought is that you rule by a committee of one; you. I say that because anything less than what you need is simply a waste. Now, realistic expectations are required but we must find a way to be fortified in a particular environment. I don’t know the answer to this one, but I do know we need to understand the rule of engagement before we accept or reject any environment. It is up to the home team to share the rules (expectations). It is up to embrace or deny.
All these rules can get confusing when we want what’s different than what is available…
When you are in someone else’s space (be it work, relationship or otherwise), it is said that you must play by their rules; really? Now, say it’s about work, and you don’t like the environment or the boss that run the environment. What are your options? You can always quit and keep your pride or you can knuckle under and accept what’s given to you. Either way, there is some maneuvering to look forward to.
What about relationships? You’re with someone who has a lot of what you seek in an ideal mate. Not to mention, you’re afraid of being alone. Now I hear all the time that one needs to be by them selves to get to know them selves. I believe that. However, what if knowing yourself mean you don’t like being alone (different from lonely). Your mate has a few quirks that are less than desirable. How do you manage that?
How much is enough to conform to what we need in order to survive the environment we choose? Is there a line that exists where enough is enough? How do we incorporate OUR rules so that our needs are met? I find that we need some calibration tool to manage the ebb & flow of our feelings so that we do not burn out sooner than later. But at the same time, there is a need to be cautious because we are judged by the standards of other rather than ourselves.
My thought is that you rule by a committee of one; you. I say that because anything less than what you need is simply a waste. Now, realistic expectations are required but we must find a way to be fortified in a particular environment. I don’t know the answer to this one, but I do know we need to understand the rule of engagement before we accept or reject any environment. It is up to the home team to share the rules (expectations). It is up to embrace or deny.
All these rules can get confusing when we want what’s different than what is available…
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